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Exasperation

I’m exasperated. I’m now waiting for dinner. I don’t know what I ordered. But I’m feeling useless here. My job is to eat food and get weighed every week. Other than that I am not working. I wish I could work on a story that I started last year. But the trips to the hospitalContinue reading “Exasperation”

Evening Thoughts

It’s after 7:30. The hurly burly of the day has died down. Dinner trays have been collected and meds have been dispensed to the residents. Our nurse is finishing up and preparing for the next day. Residents are settling down in their beds and some have the television on. Some are looking through their cellphonesContinue reading “Evening Thoughts”

Stuck

My weight today is 111.6. It’s been like this for a few days. I’m glad it’s this weight because I don’t want to lose weight anymore. I’ve been eating better and whatever the kitchen comes up with, I’m ready for it.

Progress

Lately I’ve noticed that the food the kitchen gives me is not ground but bite sized pieces. Today I had chicken which was torn in fragments with sauce. I ate it with mashed potato and spinach. I’m glad to say I ate them well.

Struggling to Reach 115

I’m currently struggling to reach 115 pounds. I’m at 111.9 pounds now. The last day has been difficult. I ordered minced turkey with mashed potato and gravy. The turkey came without gravy and mashed potato. I went to the kitchen and asked for gravy and they said that the gravy was served on the side.Continue reading “Struggling to Reach 115”

Waiting for Relief

I’ve been waiting for over half an hour for my anti anxiety medication. I’m supposed to take it at 4 pm. But 4 pm came and went and I didn’t get it. So I looked for my nurse with rising blood pressure to ask if it was indeed the time. She was at her deskContinue reading “Waiting for Relief”

My Job

My job in this nursing home is to eat my meals and take my meds every day. I have to eat so that I can gain weight. I don’t have anything else to do. I sit in bed or sit in one of the chairs in the rotunda where the nurses’ station is. Lately I’veContinue reading “My Job”

Focus

I’m trying my best to focus on one thing: to gain weight so I can reach 115 pounds. I’m being challenged by the kitchen because they have a problem cooking food for me. I’m supposed to have my meats ground with sauce on top. They haven’t done that before yesterday. I’ve spoken to the dietaryContinue reading “Focus”

Salmon

Today my cousin and his wife came to visit us. They took us to a restaurant called Applebees where we ate lunch. I picked the place because I wanted to have their Cajun salmon. I thought it would be easy to eat. When the food came I eagerly ate the first bite. However, I foundContinue reading “Salmon”

Scrambled Eggs

I’ve had a couple of days where something got stuck in my throat. I managed to recover from it. But today I felt nervous when waiting for breakfast. I ordered scrambled for breakfast. They serve scrambled eggs for breakfast every day. Sometimes the eggs break up in my mouth. I get nervous when a foodContinue reading “Scrambled Eggs”